For instance, in real life you have friends, acquaintances, family, co-workers and any other description you can come up with to describe your social relationships. Some of these are natural…such as family relationships. You can’t pick your family…they are just there. Same with co-workers, who might be friends and might not. You mostly have to make an effort to keep in contact with your family and friends. A visit, a phone call, a text message…all are ways we keep in contact in real life.
In Second Life, you actually choose who you friends are. They don’t just automatically appear on your friends list. But once on the list, they remain there until one or the other of you decides to dissolve the friendship. That can be painful…and is a visual sign that someone thought it was time to end that friendship. Unless they are hiding their status from you (would a true friend do that?), you know when a Second Life friend is about. And it’s an easy thing to send a quick IM to just acknowledge their presence.
Second Life friendships can be very deep and meaningful. I think part of the reason is that because they can be anonymous, its easier to let your guard down and let your true emotions and thoughts come forth. You might not want to do that in real life. There are no stereotypes based on appearance, because you can have whatever appearance you want. You can project yourself in whatever manner you wish and let your personality come through in whatever way you wish too. Want to be more assertive, or have a different color hair, or be thinner, or be an animal? Anything is possible in Second Life.
Communities are different in Second Life too. I belong to the New England community. I was thinking that I feel like the characters in the tv show “Cheers” must have felt. Everyone knows your name….partly because it is listed over your head…along with whatever description of yourself or group membership you want to display. But community in SL goes beyond that….when you participate in a community there for a long period of time, just like in real life, there are shared experiences that form a common bond between the members. Sometimes those experience can be quite profound and really bring the community together…like the death of one of the members….or facing the loss of an important place to the community.
Working together towards a common goal to make the community welcoming and help it grow is another way that I have bonded with my friends in my community in New England. I have known some of them for over three years now, and we have friendships that are encouraging and supportive…and I hope, long lasting.
3 comments:
I absolutely love this post. People build communities based on common interests, identification of values, and the desire to relate on a level that doesn't routinely involve knocking the person down, and retrieving your stuff. And it gets better. The big scenes in Sl, like music, and the emerging sense of art, and of course rp and other games, are founded on the more fundamental community "instinct". Kudos Jeanne.
Big Smiles.... So proud to be part of the SLNE community and most of all the honor of being one of your friends.
Thank you both for your kind words...as I re-read this post I believe that I could have stated things much more clearly and perhaps I will revisit this topic again in the future. In the meantime, I am thankful for your encouragement and continued friendship. The best thing in life is friendship, no matter which world it is found in.
Post a Comment